Whimsy Speaks Again

Just what every classroom needs: a flag and a crucifix.

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Doesn't look like Alberto is going to be vacationing in Barcelona any time soon.

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Right-wingers are so cute when they squabble among themselves.

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The most uplifting video I've seen since the Antwerp train station.

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"This weekend, Frank Rich quoted an astounding statistic from the Harvard Crimson: in Harvard's class of 2007, 58 percent of the males and 43 percent of the females chose jobs in finance and consulting."

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Note to Trekkies:  "The fastest rocket ever launched, NASA’s New Horizons probe to Pluto, roared off its pad in 2006 at 10 miles per second. That pace would be impressive in the morning commute, and it’s passably adequate for traversing the solar system, something we’ve done and will continue to do. Combustion rockets, like New Horizons, can deliver you to the Moon in a matter of days, Mars in a matter of months, and the outer planets in a matter of years. But a trip to Proxima Centauri, the nearest star beyond the Sun and 100 million times farther from us than the Moon, would consume a tedious 800 centuries or so. You’ll want to upgrade."

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You gotta figure we're not exactly winning The Drug War when Forbes puts a noted cartel boss on its list of the world's billionaires.

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From Mr. Know-It-All:  "When my father died some years ago, my mother had his head cryogenically preserved. Now that Mom has passed, too—and is buried, not frozen—can I finally lay Dad's brain to rest?"

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C&L's funny line:  "Ever notice how the wingnuts all clutch their pearls and collapse on the fainting couches whenever President Obama talks about the miserable failure that has been conservative rule?"  He also notes how conservative heads all over the nation explode when Obama makes biblical references in his speeches.

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I've been thinking about this for two days, and now someone has the answer:  "How hard is it to shoot someone in a lifeboat 100 feet away?"

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A chief executive officer of a Standard & Poor's 500 company was paid, on average, $10.4 million in total compensation in 2008, according to preliminary data from The Corporate Library.

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It's not yet the middle of April, so of course, I've already received my May/June Cooks' Illustrated.  Notes from Readers:  You shouldn't substitute salted butter for unsalted butter.  You shouldn't substitute apple juice for apple cider.  A good substitute for the herb savory is a 2-to-1 mixture of fresh thyme and fresh sage.  Baking soda does not remove odors from a refrigerator.  Quick Tips:  To remember to turn off your gas grill, put a rubber band on your wrist when you turn it on, and take it off when you turn if off (and check for rubber bands when you go to bed).  To rejuvenate leftover polenta, process it with a few tablespoons of warm water, cover with plastic wrap and microwave (but why does anyone eat polenta in the first place, I wonder).  To keep salads (potato, macaroni, what have you) cool before serving, fill a ziplock bag with ice and some salt and place at the bottom of a big bowl, then cover with lettuce leaves, then the salad.  Italian Grilled Chicken looks very good, but I'm hungry.  In this recipe, you cut through the backbone, flatten out the bird, then grill under a brick. After lots of inevitable CI experimentation, they recommend putting this concoction under the skin:  simmer oil, garlic, lemon zest, and red pepper flakes for 3 minutes, then add 3 teaspoons of fresh thyme and 2 teaspoons of fresh rosemary and cook another 30 seconds, strain, cool, mix with a tablespoon of fresh ground pepper and a teaspoon of Kosher salt.  Fire up the grill, let it die down a bit, oil the grill with olive-oil soaked paper towels, and cook 20 minutes on one side and 15 minutes on the other, under a foil-wrapped brick.  Yum.  Rescuing Grilled Beef Teriyaki looked interesting (or maybe I'm just hungry) as it recommends cheaper cuts of beef (sirloin tips or skirt steak) and has a sauce that includes rice vinegar, tamari, sake, and ginger.  To make Great Glazed Pork Tenderloins, take a tip from professional painters.  For Improving Grilled Vegetables (which I love, but maybe I'm just hungry) brush with only olive oil and kosher salt while they're cooking, then when they're off the grill, brush with a combination of olive oil, garlic, lemon zest, salt and pepper.  It sounds pretty boring, but the Best Quick Tomato Sauce sounds delicious (but perhaps I'm just hungry).  Go buy some really good crushed canned tomatoes, such as Muir Glen.  Heat (2) T of unsalted butter and sauté one medium loosely grated onion, 1/4 teaspoon of dried oregano, and 1/2 teaspoon of salt, for about 5 minutes. Add 2 medium cloves of garlic (diced or crushed) the last 30 seconds.  Stir in tomatoes and 1/4 teaspoon of sugar, increase heat to high and bring to simmer.  Reduce heat to medium-low and keep simmering for 10 minutes.  Stir in one T of EVO and two T of freshly chopped basil leaves.  Yum, again.  Foolproof Grilled Salmon Fillets and Best Blueberry Muffins held no appeal.  Better Shrimp Tempura looked interesting but not interesting enough.  Marinating facts:  marinades only penetrate a short distance into the meat;  marinades don't tenderize meat; long soaking is pointless; marinades are best for thin cuts; use salt, oil, soy and brown sugar for flavor enhancers; don't even think about using bottled dressing; wipe off marinade before cooking meat; don't recycle marinade, it's unsafe; refrigerate while marinading to limit health hazards. The best cookware set that isn't mid-four figures is the All-Clad Stainless Steel Cookware Set (10 pieces, MSRP $699), but the Tramontina is a great buy at $145 and the Calphalon Try-Ply Stainless Steel Set is up there and just $300.  Just to see if you're paying attention, I'll mention here that I once put Calphalon in a poem.  If you need chocolate chips for a recipe, the best are Ghirardelli 60% Cacao Bittersweet.  Kitchen Notes:  Don't buy pre-crumbled cheeses, they're 60% more expensive (just crumble it yourself, for goodness sake).  Only buy loose shallots, not those in boxes.  Avocados allowed to ripen in the fridge take more time, but taste better.  The dreaded Vegemite (or Marmite in OzzieLand) makes a great addition to stews, soups and sauces because it has lots of glutamates.